So we all have those days or weeks or months (some people may have years, in which case you may want to look inwards to see what your doing wrong!!) where shit happens and it is just wrong wrong wrong you just think this wasn't supposed to happen, random inexplicable stuff.
Now I'm not talking about any serious life changing events, I'm just talking about the ridiculous things that you can survive and cope with and laugh at on a day to day basis: A few things that have happened to me that I have recalled are:
Cramps
Getting cramp anywhere in your body is bad enough but during sex is not good for a woman. Guys sometime's try and carry on while this is happening to them, sometimes it works and they continue but sometimes it doesn't and they have to stop. For us women its not sexy at all, the cramp sets in, you start moaning wailing and your partner asks you if your coming (insert bb roll eyes here) and your like yeah right mate, get off me, and then you have to walk that cramp out, so you jump up and start pacing up and down like a mad woman at the time when you want to look your most sexy, cramp during sex is just wrong. Altho worse than cramp there was a time when I felt like I was having a heart attack, although it was probably just heart burn...ok moving swiftly on...........
Celibate
A few of us BDSS ladies have had this experience, where by you are seeing someone who is a firm believer in God and being a good christian, which is great, and when you've discussed the celibacy issue your told no I'm not celibate, so you think okay fair enough, the relationships plodding along everythings all good, you get intimate,maybe your intimate a few times and then all of a sudden BAM they announce that they are now being celibate. Ladies and gents I know you have been there!!! What is up with that? either your celibate or your not right? why drag people into your confused quasi-celibate shananigans. This is just wrong!
The thing is the same day when this person randomly uttered the celibate word, I'd spent the day trying to get in contact with someone for work and their voicemail was.....
Ironic right!! - I hadn't heard this song in years lmao!
Not as good as I remember (beer goggles)
I'll never forget the disappointment I felt when I looked at this person who had come to pick me up and I had to do a double take, he was much chubbier than I had remembered and I was thinking maybe what with having met him in a club, with the low lighting, mixed with being drunk, this was not good. If this wasn't bad enough he actually asked me, if he looked like I remembered him to be, now BDSS'ers I'm sure there are times where your face gives away your true feelings automatically without you wanting it to. As soon as he uttered the question I tried to mumble (I didn't want to lie to him too loudly! I felt less quilty this way) "oh yeah of course" in the most convincing voice possible, but my face just betrayed me (I hate this when this happens, its got a mind of its own and just contorted into this horrified look that said screamed hell no!) needless to say I never saw him again after that date, not that I wanted to, but its just wrong that he was not as hot as I remembered.
My face betrayed me
I was on a night out with the ladies, we fancied a bite to eat, so where do you go? kebab shop clearly! I walk into the shop and come face to face with a drunk woman with missing teeth and who is looking very worse for wear, before I could stop my face, it gave this completely shock, scared, horrified look, I actually was startled and jumped back. I honestly felt so awful afterwards even though it was a natural reaction, needless to say the woman wasn't happy, she was cursing me in her drunk state, which was okay because it meant that I couldn't understand a word of the insults she was drunkenly slurring and she posed no physical threat to me! I got my kebab and left!! Face betrayal is just wrong!
Cowboy dreads
I went to St Lucia in december and there were alot of things that surprised me about the place, for example, there seemed to be a lot of either rastaferians or people with their hair in locks over there. This I found curious so I did actually ask someone why is this, lol! but the funniest thing I saw out there was a dread galloping fast down the road on horseback, A cowboy dread! This is not something I've seen or am used to and also what I couldn't for the life of me understand is where he was going so fast, and the ganja smell was wafting.
So BDSS'ers this is just some randomness thats made me laugh over the years, do you have any randomness to share? Be it sex cramps, sex farts, dates from hell, kebab shop fights, face betrayals or whatever, I'd like to hear from you, just so I know I'm not alone!!!
