Well this post was initially going to be about dates from hell, but I decided to write this post because I was in the mood for more of a rant! Plus I thought any man that may read Si's great post Where Are All The Great Men? Will be able to perfect themselves by reading the list. Now I've compiled a list of rules just like Biggie did in the 10 Crack Commandments - classic Tune!
Rule 1: Pay For The First Date! I'm into equal opportunities, and will happily split stuff in a relationship, but there is nothing worse than a man not even offering to pay in the early stages of dating. I may offer to pay half but I expect to hear “No I'll pay” not have a man pass me the receipt so I can work out how much my starter, main, desserts and drink came to. Once I went on a date and the guy turned up 30 minutes late whilst I was standing in the rain, because he was getting his hair done. Looking back that was a red flag right there but I stupidly stayed. We proceeded to go for a meal, and at the end he made it very clear that we should split it both ways. I adamantly refused and said that he had a cheek to even suggest that, especially when he had kept ME waiting. He relented in the end but that is a deal breaker for me.
Rule 2: Don't Talk About Your Ex! I'm really not interested in hearing about your ex, if she was that great why are you by MY side? If she was that bad why don't you shut up about her? Hearing about a guys ex also leaves you thinking about whether he's still into her, and can make you feel insecure. An ex was obsessed with his ex and in the end I find out he was cheating with her - Not good!
Rule 3: Hold Down Your Own Sh*it! A man should be able to take care of business in order to class himself as a man. No woman (in her right mind) wants a man that can't cook, clean, pay bills, and generally take care of himself, unless she wants a grown a** baby. It's not attractive and will send many women eventually running in the opposite direction once they find out the 'Real Deal'.
Rule 4: Stand On Your Own Two Feet! Men are not women, it's okay for me to confer with my friends when I have a dilemma because I am a female and that what females generally do. Men who need to speak to their mums, other family members and friends for every decision in their lives are boys. I want a man that knows his own mind and trusts his own judgement, not run to his Mama all the time!
Rule 5: Do Not Cry (or show other signs of emotional weakness unnecessarily)! Now there are certain situations I would expect a man to cry don't get me wrong, but if you breakdown when we are watching Green Mile or something, I am likely to do a runner and not look back. I do not find it endearing to see a man cry at all, just like I don't find it attractive for him to be hiding behind me when we see a mouse in the house. Man up! Yesterday I was watching The Hunks on Sky Living, and Vaughan one of the guys on the show was running away from a goat whilst screaming like a little girl, this guy is a Punk sorry but he is.
Rule 6: Look After Your Child/ren: Unfortunately many children are being brought up in households without their Dads there. If this is you there is absolutely no excuse for you not to take an active role in your child's life. It really shocks me how there are certain men out there that actually think it's just the woman's responsibility to take care of the children that they helped make. If you want a real woman's respect look after your kids, it gives a major insight into how you will treat the children in your relationship if you are to have them.
Rule 7: Healthy Hygiene: This is pretty self explanatory, wash your body and brush your teeth – simple. The amount of men up in the club that clearly cannot smell their armpits still shocks me. Gosh G you were so handsome but you stunk – Deal Breaker!
Rule 8: Have Some Depth: It's refreshing to be with a man who's life just doesn’t revolve around going out clubbing, and making papers. For me spiritual awareness, and a overall depth of character is a must. I want food for my brain not a man that is unstimulating and dull. Yes *ex is also important, but it's nice to be with someone that opens your eyes to certain things, and shares your views.
Rule 9: You Are Not Mr Marcus or Lexington Steel! Sorry I'm not into a man that shaves or plucks any part of his orifice - leave it to the ladies! Yes male porn stars may shave their pubes off, but please guys NO, leave it to them! It just looks a bit homosexual when men do that. By the way to guys that do this, it doesn't make your d**k look bigger!
Rule 10: Do Not Ask How Many People I Have Slept With! Now if a girl has slept with 1 to 5 men she may tell you, after that it goes into shaky territory, so it's better to not go there. You'll probably not get the truth anyway and furthermore it's none of your business!
So BDSS'ers have you got any rules to add to the list! Do you agree or disagree with some of them? Viewers please feel free to comment!
Great list Bi as we are only looking for perfect men around here! haha
ReplyDeleteRule 1: Pay For The First Date! AGREE (sorry MUFU) a cheap skate on the first date signals a cheap skate ongoing. I mean it's one day were we're trying to impress each other, so if your cheap I will not be impressed. Just don't ask me out if your money is not right right now!
Rule 2: Don't Talk About Your Ex! AGREE unless you and her have some kids or a mortgage together, something to keep you in each other lives then fear enough, if however you keep bringing her up in arguments by saying things like "my ex was cool when I did that"... just please! (I have no words!)
Rule 3: Hold Down Your Own Sh*it! AGREE I addressed that in "I am not your mother" post... I'm not your mother, we are a team i.e together we better, not together your better and I'm worse off sturggling holding you down! NO...
Rule 4: Stand On Your Own Two Feet! I kind of agree, if you can't do anything with out consulting your mother first, ALWAYS then we have a problem, but a man that seeks WISE counsel from time to time is all good!
Rule 5: Do Not Cry (or show other signs of emotional weakness unnecessarily)! I don't necessarily think crying in itself = emotional weakness but there is definitely appropriate times and place... watching Green Mile ain't one of them so I agree! Running away from a creepy crawly and leaving me to deal with it gets a hell NO!! If you can't man up to a wasp, what happen if I'm in a fight or something?
Rule 6: Look After Your Child/ren AGREE 101% those kids never asked to be born to a deadbeat father. As a man you should know you have an important role in shaping your children, you are important to them, therefore should act accordingly.
Rule 7: Healthy Hygiene: AGREEE x 10000!!
Rule 8: Have Some Depth: Yes... as we saw on here recently the problem when someone has no depth is that they want to be applauded for things like taking you out for dinner or taking you on holiday, spending a bit of cash (which normal happy people in relationships do all day every day)... those things are nice however it's what you got in your head and your heart that counts... so you can be splashing the cash and still be a fool!! So morals are definitely important!
Rule 9: You Are Not Mr Marcus or Lexington Steel! I will allow plucking only in the event you have a unibrow any other hair should remain on your body, thanks Si
(Although David Beckham was rocking shaved legs the other day and he could possibly get a pass)...
Rule 10: Do Not Ask How Many People I Have Slept With!
I don't think the number really matters (5 or above)
This is one of them ones were I need to know why your asking in the first place. If its because you are cool and you understand I had relationships before you, then ask away. If it's to use against me in the court of law (i.e an argument) then don't ask!
COME AGAIN!!
Good read. Rule 1 really does depend on who you are dating though. There are women who don't want that. The hard part is working out the correct preference. Mind you, I was in Denmark for a long time and some things run differently there. Rule 4 is a little harsh if you mean that men can't talk their issues out with others, although with mum? that's for sure a no no lol. Rule 9 - how big is your actual porn collection :p
ReplyDeleteHaha that is the question! lmao
ReplyDeleteThanks Jabbamp, yes I agree every woman has their own preference a man paying whilst we're dating is just mine :) I agree that men should be able to consult with friends and family - even their mother, I just think some men take it to the extreme and run to their friends and family over everything. If you're in a relationship with someone like this it can be ver annoying. My porn collection is huge lol - not really :D
ReplyDeleteTo all other commenters the original post was deleted, please feel free to repost your comments. Thanks!!
ReplyDeleteI agree with most of the points you raise but how about a list for the guys?
ReplyDeleteIf we said we wanted someone to cook, clean, look after the kids, not speak out against us in a public setting, and keep disputes away from your extended family, what would you say to that?
Hey BlackEvolution,
ReplyDeleteI think a list from the guy's could be very informative! I think alot of women are keen to know what exactly men want, and also fair is fair Bi laid down the man Rules lol! So there can be no complaining for Woman Rules.
Right now, I can easily do the whole "keeping disputes away from extended family" and the whole "not speaking out against your man in public settings" easily that is fine, However when it comes to all the rest of the cooking, cleaning, looking after the kids etc If I meet someone and they tell me that this is exclusively what they are looking for in a woman, that it is essentially what a woman should do, then It just wouldn't work. I'm just not into those old school, rigid, traditional, gender roles.
I would prefer a man who is willing to partake in these activities as well because quite frankly why shouldn't he! Its your families bellie's that need feeding so feed them, it's your families house that needs cleaning, so clean it, and its Your kids that need you to interact and engage in their life so take care of them. I dont think these things are things that should be pushed exclusively onto a female in a relationship!